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“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” ~ Carl Jung.

It is not unusual for many of my clients to discover their predisposition to aggression, procrastination, perfectionism, confrontation avoidance or external approval as key reasons that hold them back from manifesting their intent for positive change. If you too have strong personality traits that limit you from experiencing deeper happiness, read on.

In a world driven by a sense of individualism, our everyday pursuits are heavily motivated subconsciously by the belief that we are the masters of our destiny – that we have the freedom to make conscious choices to create our own reality. All the same, volumes of diverse ancient philosophical thought as well as recent scientific research point to a more passive role played by humans – one that is guided majorly by our inborn individual programming.

I believe that while the former approach is more valid for our material reality, the latter dictates our inner state of being. Building a working knowledge of these divergent perspectives is crucial to our state of contentment, happiness and well-being. It can help us better direct our daily efforts, thereby raising our professional and personal effectiveness, and make greater sense of the motivations and behavior of others, thus facilitating healthier relationships.

What is predetermined in life?

What is predetermined in life are the laws of nature – like, the law of karma, the law of impermanence, the cycle of life and death. The law of karma has a particular relevance to the above theme.

As per this law, our thoughts, feelings and motivations in the present are dictated by our cumulative stored karma of the past. Why with the same stimulus, some people instinctively get angry and others don’t, why some children are predisposed to an ambitious drive while others are comfortable going with the flow and so on, is pre-arranged in our karmic psyche.

We are born with this karmic psyche and with every interaction with our environment, we continue to generate and store additional karma. Each of our thoughts, intentions and actions is then guided by this storehouse. The things that make us scared or anxious or angry continue to do so repeatedly, often throughout our life.

From a scientific perspective, our DNA, the genetic code, carries the entire history and the future of any being. Jerry Coyne, an evolutionary biologist at the University of Chicago, argues that “Any decision we make is merely a series of complex electrical and chemical impulses between molecules in the brain — molecules whose configuration is predetermined by genes and environment.”

The first level of choice

While our karmic imprint dictates our inner destiny (our thoughts, feelings, motivations – our psycho-spiritual make-up), it does not necessarily determine our outer experiences in the material world, particularly in the short-term. The actions we take and the environment we choose to create and operate in directly influence the material reality we experience in our life – how smartly we work and the type of work environment we choose impacts our level of professional success; the time and energy we invest in our relationships shapes the quality of our relationships.

All the same, even if an insecure person becomes professionally successful, she would continue to be insecure about her position or future; a business leader who gets angry easily will behave the same way even if he chooses to run an NGO to help the needy; and a self-centred person, guided by a strong ego, will continue to be unhappy despite all the financial success.

Unless we consciously choose to deal with our karmic imprint, it routinely reveals itself in our life. We move from one toxic relationship to another, we find one circumstance or the other to feel agitated, and we move from one job to the other blaming our boss or the organization – continuing our suffering and inner unhappiness.

The real choice

We exercise real choice only when we consciously choose not to be automatically governed by our conditioned preferences and biases – for example, when we choose not to be fearful or angry in situations that routinely make us anxious or upset. Our ability to make such newer and healthier choices is determined by our level of self-awareness and mindfulness in the moment – how aware we are of our conditioned responses and how mindful we are of choosing to not fall prey to them.

Only when we choose to pause from our fast-paced life and connect within, and become aware of our perfectionism, procrastination, envy, greed and judgmental nature, can we start the process of choosing to be more wholistic, strong-willed, empathetic, accepting and nurturing. Only when we start to examine our conditioned beliefs (more is better, success automatically leads to happiness…) and choose to imbibe healthier alternatives, can we become poised to liberate ourselves from our inner destiny.

Implication in our life

Arguably, what good is our material progress if we remain ill equipped to reforming our inner being; what’s the merit in our climbing the social, career or financial ladder if we cannot win the battles of our mind?

Acknowledging the role of inner destiny in our life and aligning our life to the above principles has multiple implications. Firstly, building greater self-awareness provides us insights about what our natural dispositions are and what line of work or life are we most suited for. Creating a life aligned to that helps us progress towards our inherent potential with the least inner resistance and effort – letting our higher inner self express itself through us towards manifesting the reality that we were gifted to create.

Further, becoming more deeply aware of our own emotional triggers and deep-rooted biases helps us be more empathetic to the varied preferences and behaviours of others. We are less judgmental and more accepting of others then – it’s not them, it’s their karmic imprint! Finally, committing to working with and reforming the unhealthier aspects of our karmic instincts allows us to experience a more fuller, rewarding and happier life.