When Bachendri Pal, the first Indian woman to climb the Mount Everest, was addressing a gathering of corporate professionals, one of the leaders in the audience asked, “Your life seems so complete, but you have set such a high benchmark of accomplishment for the rest of us that our lives can never feel remarkable enough.” Reflecting on the question, Ms. Pal responded, “We all have an Everest within us, that we can aim to conquer.”

So true. Each of us has our own share of inner challenges that are worth overcoming. They come in the form of our heightened fears, insecurity, jealousy, doubts, aggression, laziness, anger, judgmental nature and so on. While we get easily consumed by chase of material progress, we lose sight of the deeper and more meaningful work that we can do within ourselves.

Why bother?

Unless our inner personality issues are resolved, they continue to haunt us in all aspects of our life. Our emotional volatility leads to dissatisfying relationships, our distorted self-image hinders good judgment, our limiting beliefs produce imbalance and sub-optimal health, and our lack of clear purpose in life results in undercurrents of unhappiness and lack of fulfillment.

As Mahatma Gandhi said, ‘Working on ourselves is the noblest deed we can do in this world.’ Behind every great individual is a burning desire to overcome their inner demons – what made Gandhi an inspirational leader was his commitment to be fearless of his oppressors, what made Mother Teresa exceptional was her devotion to nurture her selfless nature. Such work builds character, leads to a more meaningful life, and offers a great sense of personal accomplishment and completeness. Moreover, our individual progress in this way makes our world a better place.

6 steps to the path within

1.  Acknowledge your personal Everest

To embark on this journey, you need to begin by first recognizing what your personal Everest is. What comes in the way of your building deeper relationships? What holds you back from enjoying greater success at work? How do you routinely tend to sabotage yourself? What would others close to you say you should improve on to lead a more complete life?

While you maybe already quite aware of your inner demons, pausing from a busy life to reflect on such questions could lead you to clarify what you most need to work on. It doesn’t have to be one thing, but could be a few areas that you believe need addressing.

2.  Choose to step out of comfort zone

While from time to time, particularly during moments of reflection, we recognize the importance of reforming our inner being and even resolve to get started (remember some of the new year resolutions!), soon enough we get sucked in the pulls and pressures of our daily routine and lose the precious sparks of change that may have got ignited.

As Alcoholics Anonymous believes, ‘People often expect different results from doing the same actions’. Change is indeed difficult for all of us. But, real change is possible only when we become open to stepping out of our comfort zone. Unfortunately, too many of us wait for a significant crisis to shake us out of our slumber – a job loss, a relationship challenge or a serious illness. It doesn’t have to be this way – we can consciously choose to be our own catalyst for personal transformation. 

3.  Learn the techniques

No different from the mountaineers, besides discipline and will-power, we also need to follow the right techniques to progress on the path to our inner Everest. It’s a truism that there are many paths to heaven and indeed there is no one size fits all formula for this journey. There is a whole range of solutions- from meditation, reading self-help books and listening to inspirational talks to working with a therapist, psychologist or a life coach- that work for different people. Find the ones that work for you and immerse yourself in that. Remember, it’s not only practice, but right practice, that makes perfect.

Besides, recognizing that experts can be helpful in supporting your journey of change and being open to seeking help, even if from an experienced friend or a wise relative, can accelerate your journey.

4.  Share your plans

Research shows that sharing your goals with others increases the chances of their being achieved. Consider sharing your plans and goals with those close to you or those who are likely to be touched by your efforts. It could be a spouse, peer, parent, friend, or a supervisor at work. Firstly, making your intentions public raises your commitment towards your goals. Further, others then become your allies in this transition – more attuned to noticing the changes in you, acting as your check and balance, and perhaps a source of positive reinforcement for your efforts.

5.  Establish measurable mini-milestones

One of the most common sources of setback in the journey of personal change is establishing audacious goals. While such goals can be inspirational, and it’s healthy to keep your sights on them, the proverbial journey of a thousand steps needs to be broken down into several tiny steps. Establishing mini-milestones, particularly that are measurable (number of times you lost temper in a week or the occasions you overcame your fears), tracking your progress through a journal, and acknowledging yourself for the small wins can help you build momentum. Small-size goals also ensure that you don’t easily get disheartened from any setback (which you are bound to experience in this path).

6.  Persevere with your path

Too often we either don’t commit ourselves deeply enough for an extended period of time or consider every setback to be a big blow and give up too soon. One of the toughest things about climbing Mount Everest is staying motivated for many months – getting into top condition, waiting for your opportunity to climb in an inclement weather, falling sick and carrying on, unexpected situations that can weaken your resolve. Personal change is no different and takes time and determination, but sticking to it and accomplishing meaningful personal goals can be as remarkable as climbing the Mount Everest.